As a massage therapist, you learn quickly that no two people, sessions or experiences are alike. And then there are those that are particularly unique.
When I heard that March 18th is National Awkward Moments Day, I decided it offered the perfect opportunity to commemorate 10 of the most memorable awkward moments I have experienced as a massage therapist and a business owner. Each of these doozies deserves their moment to shine. Enjoy!
1. “KNIFE, KNIFE!”
An older client had such severe sciatic pain that when I worked on the area, she explained that it felt like a knife was cutting her. When going over the area again, she yelled, “KNIFE, KNIFE!” Anyone outside of the room would have thought I was trying to attack her! I explained that although she could say and do what she wanted, yelling, “KNIFE!” was perhaps not the best choice of words.
2. Just One Stone.
A client asked for a hot stone add-on and I realized there was only one stone available in the room. That’s right – I gave a full-body hot stone massage with just a single stone. And the client LOVED it!
3. No Prenatal Pillows?
I had to give a prenatal massage and discovered there were no prenatal pillows available. So, I created my own prenatal cushion fortress using bolsters, rolled towels and the throw pillows from the waiting area. The expecting client was comfortable and supported – the ultimate example of making do with what you have!
4. “Oh, Mickey!”
Relaxing spa music was playing during a routine couples’ massage. Then – ooops! – this cut in from the playlist: “Oh Mickey, you’re so fine! You’re so fine, you blow my mind... Hey, Mickey!” Comic relief is therapeutic and calming, right?
5. So Much Hair!
Then there was the client who had so much ungroomed back hair that, when it was time to massage, all of the hair got collected on my hands. Hmmnnn...What to do?
6. SUPERZOOM Massage
A client arrived almost 30 minutes after the appointment start time, and insisted on still receiving a full-body massage. I was able to complete the full massage in 35 minutes and the client left happy – proof that if there’s a will, there’s a way!
7. Arguably Awkward.
A guy and gal came in for a romantic couples’ massage – and fought through the entire session. Sometimes it’s a good idea to book separate rooms…
8. Keep Them On!
During a pre-session consultation, a client began to get undressed. Note to newbies: please wait until your practitioner leaves the room to disrobe.
The very first time I saw cupping marks on a client, and didn’t know what they were. ‘Nough said, right?
A client came in 10 minutes late for a massage appointment, then set an alarm to end the session 10 minutes early to be on time for a dinner reservation. I guess relaxation was not on the menu?